Dirt Cheap Madrid

Ah, Spain. Quite possibly home to the friendliest people on earth. I myself am a seasoned traveler, and I’ve seen much of the country traveling solo, and if I had a euro for every time a local invited me to join his or her group of friends, I’d be rich as hell.

That said, if you’re lookin’ for some lovin’, you have also come to the right place. Spaniards are real cachondos (check your dictionary for that one, or, better yet, ask a native!) and wherever you go, it won’t be long before you are surrounded by new friends. Take it from there: if you want to really cut to the chase, there are a few places/areas where you are guaranteed a hook up.

Kapital
This is a really fun macro-disco: seven floors with music ranging from Spanish pop to house and techno to R&B, karaoke, a movie theatre, and, well, whatever else you can think of. There’s definitely an interesting mix of Spanish students and foreigners up for some action if you know what I mean. It’s not the cheapest place to party, but girls can count on an inexpensive night once they find a boy (or various) to buy them drinks. It’s not an especially challenging task.  Open seven days a week until dawn, and don’t forget to dress the part (no sneakers or flip flops).

Calle Atocha 124
Metro Atocha (L1)
Tel. 91 420 2906
www.grupo-kapital.com

Anywhere in Huertas
I’ll be honest: Huertas is full of foreigners and Spanish people who want to meet, practice their crappy English and make out with foreigners. Take Calle Principe to Calle Huertas, both of which are literally a succession of bar after bar after bar. Most of them have no cover charge, so get to drinking and get it on with someone. And rest assured, there’s enough love for everyone in this hood.

Metro Sevilla (L2)

Irish Pubs
Irish pubs are notorious for hooking up, and there is a nice selection scattered through the city. Again, they are often frequented by foreigners and the Spaniards who want to have sex with them after they impress you with their teeny tiny English vocabularies (hopefully that’s the only thing that’s teeny tiny!). Usually quite dark and spacious, I encourage you to order a pint and then get to work! There’s no time to waste!

O’Connell St.
Calle Espoz y Mina, 7
Metro Sol (L1, L2, L3)

Moore’s
Calle Felipe III, 4
Metro Sol (L1, L2, L3)
O’Neills
Calle Príncipe, 12
Metro Sol (L1, L2, L3)

Cats
Not to be confused with the Broadway play, this bar is right in the heart of studentville, which is out of the center (because the university is not in the center) but well worth the journey if you want to kick it with a generally Spanish crowd. This rather large disco-bar caters to student’s budgets too, so leave your Centurion Card back at the hostel, and bring a few bills. There’s live music, djs, and typical spring-break type activities like wet t-shirt contests. Party on!

Calle Julián Romea, 4
Metro Guzman el Bueno (L6, L7)

Palacio Gaviria
The original meat market! Parties at this palace-cum-disco are downright legendary. The people here are so horny they’d make out with the plants. Take your pick between three different rooms: Latin music, techno and pop, and get ready to dance your face off. Careful though, a trip to this venue guarantees plenty of embarrassment the next day.

Calle Arenal, 9
Metro Sol (L1, L2 L3) or Metro Opera (L2)